With apologies to Scott Karp.
I hereby announce the first major aggregator of legacy newsprint style reporting for the 21st century, “ReadWipeWeb.com” the first newspaper printed on 100% recycled toilet tissue packaged on a 1000ft. long, 24″ wide roll. Read, then wipe. The content will also be available on the web – get it?
Each 10 year subscription will also include, as our gift to you for subscribing, a 27″ Apple iMac of 2009 vintage, to be used as an a Kindle style reader. That’s right, a specialty modified Macintosh all in one computer on a wheeled hand truck with self-contained fuel-cell power (butane gas-powered fuel cells really exist). An honest to goodness TSA waiver is included. An attractive hinged cover is included, making your new e-book reader look very similar to an oversized Surface tablet. I know that Sony now makes a 19 inch Android tablet , so this is my contribution to the product matrix.
So, !000FT of toilet paper roll printed with Web Finance and Deals news from the Valley, and a 2009 Vintage iMac 27 i7 converted to a e-book reader, powered by a Butane Fuel Cell. you want a 4G Portable WiFi Hotspot? Go buy one, ya big dummies!